April 27 - Must Ash

I've been feeling the pangs of loneliness lately.

I haven't made the bed in 27 days.

Prob'ly cuz most nights end on the couch.

When I do make it to bed, I sleep next to a Yamaha keyboard.

Isn't that just so emo and cute?

Just like Kurt Coboring.

Oh, and I'm not getting a haircut til after the tour.

And I stopped shaving, too.

I think I'm growing a moustache.

Again.

In The Year 2000, I decided to grow a moustache. I wanted to try it out. Irony was still alive and well (thanks a lot, 9/11!). So why not. What occurred above my lips was a mangy dead caterpillar that doubled as a friend repellent. For the entire summer I resembled an ethnic Unabomber.

So let's do it again, right?

Due to lazy genes, it's going to take a couple of weeks to come in. We're looking at a release date of May 11. But before it drops, I'll be mistaken for a homeless pervert.

This all sounds like smart geniusy stuff, but...

Do I really want to do something I already failed at in my lost 20's?

No.

So this time I'm going to try to make the moustache look presentable.

I might invest in a tiny comb and a wax, or whatever you use to tame it.

Maybe some sleeping snoods.

Then I'll trim it.

My goal is to look like a conquistador.

I may fail at this.

Again.

But at least I will have done something ? ... uh ? with my life ...while Lauren's away ?

Until then, at least I won't have to put on make up for Bitter Tears shows.

I already look horrid.

Verdict: Loss