November 30 - Lauren Wins, Therefore...

Today I biked to Kinko's.
I mean Fedex Office.
I mean who cares.

To file unemployment electronically in Ill-annoy, you need to use a PC.
I own a Mac.
Did I ever tell you I auditioned for those Mac/PC ads years ago?
At the audition, I was supposed to be paired up with my good friend Mick.
But Mick blew it off.
I wish I had blown it off, too.
I could have eaten a sandwich or something.
Instead of riding the fence between nervousness and apathy.

Where was I?
Oh yeah, at Kinko's.
I mean FexEd.
I mean who gives a rat's fax.
Ha ha!
Still got it!

Um, yeah.
I filled out all the unemployment crap on a Windows 97 machine.
It made clicking noises until I think it all went through.
I guess.
I wiped the ribbon ink off my hands and went home.

Lauren's been a busy one this month.
For the second year, she entered NaNoWriMo.
It means National Novel Writing Month.
So Lauren wrote a novel this month.
Pretty impressive.


So normally, this would be a loss for me.
I went to Kinko's.
I mean FedFux Orifice.
(Still got it!)
And I applied for the dole yet again.
On paper, a worthless day.

But you see, I am engaged now.
To a creative, driven, and productive woman.
Now we experience things together as a unit.
Like a sexy Voltron.
Or those evil GI Joe Twins.
Tomax and Xamot.
When she wins, I win.
When I win, she wins.

Today she finished a novel.
And so now I wrote half of it.
I think this is how it works.
Lazy worthlessness finally pays off for ME.

Verdict: Win

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